Most of what I do in the class is a game, a trick.
And that's why it will always be misunderstood until the day we merge back with Source.
I must say I have been supported from above, and it is really only my self-doubts that stop occasionally the Energy to do its work.
Most of what I do in the class is a game, a trick. And this applies to almost everything I do .... This is so because Tantra is about something Beyond Everything ..... I had consistent visions about this during my original Tantra training. So although I am not quite sure what it is, I know when it is present. I have traced it back to the origin of the Universe and back to the "crack between Universes".
So I do consider Tantra more powerful than anything else I have experienced including shamanism. Otherwise I won't be doing it. And it is more powerful because it works with Pure Consciousness, with the essence of being Human. Which is the essence of everything but in humans has this extra conscious element. (Of course, certain shamans especially those from native cultures, have a lot more experience and have purified their own consciousness to a very high degree, so their work is extremely powerful. Probably as powerful as it gets within our own human realm. But at that level it does not matter exactly what one does and what it is called shamanism or tantra or sufism or druidism ..... though I call all those "shamanism" because this is an invented Western word so it actually does not exist. Or when I am among people who are stuck on shamanism I call that same thing Tantra ...).
Tantra is a very funny fish. I haven't quite figured it out ... and probably never will ... but for me Tantra is God Presence. Tantra is all there is. And everything is a creation of our consciousness, both the good and the bad. So why protect ourselves from our own creations? ... It does not make sense ..... Every other spiritual/healing practice operates in some version of a lack of total connection with All That Is, despite what they may be saying and what they may believe. That's why for them there will always be an In and an Out, a Me and a You etc. .... But Tantra somehow managed to say, "To hell with all that nonsense. Let's go for the jugular". And it got it! .......... And that's why it is so misunderstood. And that's why it will always be misunderstood until the day we merge back with Source.
So in the Tantra class a lot goes on, and because all sorts of stuff goes on, current life/past lives/future aspirations, so it is messy. But that's the only way Tantra can happen. It collapses everything onto the Now ... and that's why Tantra does not believe in working through several lifetimes in order to "awaken". That Illumination can happen any moment. That's why all Tantra techniques are trick-techniques. They are designed to get us to see beyond the "story" - whether this is a mind story, or a body story, or an emotion-story, or an entity-story.
I'd say shamanism in the jungle, or in the Siberian forest or the African desert works like that.
What I am trying to do is develop a healing/energy practice for my current environment (Western) based on what I consider an older and more comprehensive body of practices. And I am fully using my background as a social theorist, social philosopher, my own blood lineages to pre-Greek Balkan ecstatic traditions (traces of the only male Tantra tradition in the world I have found only where Bulgaria is now, so it probably is no surprise that this is what I am trying to bring out), also to pre-Tibetan really ancient traditions, and a few more...... I have a Virgo Moon which usually means that a big part of my mission in this life is to bring back older forgotten knowledge.
So I know that in my "Tantra" classes a little bit more than even Tantra happens. Towards the end of my Tantra training I had started calling it Beyond Tantra ... which started bringing its own problems ...
But the relevance of all this is that when I dance around people - and I usually follow energy patterns and create vortexes around people, I work with vortexes a lot - or when I touch them, or when I avoid looking at them, that's when my illuminations and extractions happen. And for me the empowering happens because people work through their own stuff. There is no illumination but self-illumination as far as I am concerned. My job is just to stay in the background and keep repeating, "You can do it. You can do it. Go for it. You can do it. Forgive yourself. You can do it. Love yourself. You can do it. You can do it.".
Obviously the group energy has to rise to a certain level. Obviously I have my own up and down days. Obviously because I am trying to use everything, and bring everything, and solve everything with one master-stroke it can get messy ........ but I must say I have been supported from above, and it is really only my self-doubts that stop occasionally the Energy to do its work.
What I mean when I say that "Tantra is always about something else". All the exercises and techniques are just tricks to bring us closer to experiences in which we taste our own authenticity, realness, aliveness. And then it is really up to the person .... I can turn up the heat, and things will shift faster but I have made a decision not to do this in the weekly class. There simply isn't enough time to ensure the safety of the experience.... Though if absolutely necessary, of course, I can nudge the person in the direction of faster persona-dissolution.
These days I just stay in the Moment and respond to whatever comes up. It's hard to explain ... The main work is on energy level which usually needs to be grounded in the body. Or sometimes the body-work triggers the energy work. I like the physical side of my work as I seem to have huge natural skill in it but also because people are not touched and do not touch much. Definitely not consciously. So when I touch or handle stronger a person this is just the physical side of my "channeling". I love actually witnessing how the Energy passes through me and into the person. Or when I press on a point and the Guys Above start pouring good stuff into the body. I guess most clients do not see the positions I take with my body to facilitate the flow of Energy/Transmission. Obviously my work goes beyond Tantra but for the moment this is the container that fits most for it.
For information and registration for the classes and workshops
083-1751439 / vbondov(@)gmail.com